Hm, an interesting thought occured to me just now.
I am not ill because I know what my illness is.

I know my problem hence I don't have one. It's kind of true, I guess. I know I have an ED but because I know about it it can't take over control anymore as much as it used to. It's not defining my life to such an extent anymore, simply because I know this is my problem. I can live with it, I can cope, even manage. Sometimes it gets the better of me but in the end it's always me who's in charge. Knowledge is so powerful. I'm not in control but knowing that I lack control gives me a lot more of it.

Yesterday evening I went running and even though I had had some grapes and a drink just before I left I felt like I'd faint every time I slowed down to catch my breath. I actually got dizzy and had to be careful to not turn my head too quickly in order to keep going straight. Very weird. I enjoy running very much, it's nice to feel my heart pumping, listen to some music and see the trees go all beautiful. I love the colours of autumn here, everything is red and yellow, and absolutly stunning in the evening light. Anyway, I'll see how it goes tonight...